it's warm outside, but inside, i'm cold

it is currently forty degrees in madison. madisonianites throughout the city are practically wearing shorts and t-shirts in honor of the un-seasonably warm weather. the streets are wet with melting snow and bushes and plants are peaking out from under diminishing piles of crystalized precipitation. we didn't have a thaw mid-winter last year so the snow just piled higher and higher all season until spring came. i think i like it but i'm pretty sure it will just illicit extra hard complaining during the next snow.

so outside, it's warm, but inside, my heart is frozen. in three days, flavia takes my two favorite things in the world away for a month. she might as well rip my heart out and stomp on it with spikes. blake and ziva are going to see three sets of grandparents, various aunts and uncles, and numerous cousins in two states before returning to me, a shell of a human being. they won't remember me, and they will have grown up and become completely different people, but they will return to me. excuse me, i need to blow my nose and wipe my eyes.

last night i prayed their flights out of wisconsin get cancelled. is that bad? i know it's selfish, but is it bad? i want them to see their grandparents, i would just rather their grandparents come to madison to see them. a month for goodness sake! sigh. sad face. sigh again.

ps - i didn't really pray their flights get cancelled mom. god knew i wasn't asking for real.

make your voices heard

'cause i can't. i lost my voice in one of the worst colds i've had in a long time and i sound rediculous. the best part is that the sound coming out of my throat is totally unpredictable. when i'm talking, i'm really shouting because the people i'm talking to can't hear me. the unpredictability comes in when i'll suddenly, unexpectedly have a clear sound come out and since i'm shouting, out comes a shouted clear sound. it's pretty awesome. especially when i'm on the phone with my sister in the library. oh, and i have to conduct three interviews today for a final project due today. we'll see how those go.

on a bright note, the owner of my apartment building is building me a pantry and it should be done by monday. added square footage, added storage space, me likee.

just a little rant

laughing. love it! i especially like when something tickles me enough to make me laugh out loud. you know what i don't love? 'lol'. that three-letter abbreviation for 'laughing out loud' drives me up the flippin' wall. everytime i see it, i cringe. i've actually had to cut back on my facebook time because I was getting a headache from all of the cringing. i don't know why it annoys me so much but it does; i seriously have a visceral reaction to it. there are lots of ways to let someone know they've said something you think is funny without using 'lol'. what's even more annoying is when someone writes something, and then, to make sure other people think what he/she wrote is funny, he/she adds 'lol' to their own comment. so. gross. you want people to think you're funny? be funny. you shouldn't have to tell them to 'lol'. ugh. and don't try to be funny and comment on this post by writing 'lol'. i will throw up on you or never speak to you again.

sky mall - my favorite things (one through eight)

recently, i had the pleasure of traveling from wisconsin to california and back. three flights to cali and three flights to wisconsin. some people may think this sounds painful, but it was actually really painful. totally worth it to see my family though. six flights and four layovers gave me ample opportunity to thoroughly explore, nay, experience, the skymall. that's right, the catalogue in the seatback in front of you that says, 'free copy - take it, we'll replace it!' sure, we've all glanced through it on a flight here and there, but i used three full flights to look at every item on every page. i have selected my top 34 favorite items and tonight will be listing items from the spy gadgets and anti-spy gadgets genres. my comments are in italics.

• multifunction sound-activated video camera pen: video pen is the easiest, stealthiest way to capture true events! collecting solid evidence often times requires keen discretion...

and presenting solid evidence in court requires you follow the law and get permission before recording people.

• spy ear: it's the next best thing to being a fly on the wall! the office can be a pretty hectic place these days, and it's not always easy or prudent to make every meeting…disguised as an innocuous penholder, the spyear actually holds a listening device…best of all, the spyear features a working digital face with a clock, calendar, and thermostat.

first of all how is it not prudent to make every meeting? i like that the self-proclaimed ‘best’ features are the clock, calendar, and thermostat.

• spy pen: carry an eyewitness in your pocket. click this pen and it doesn't just write words it records video…nobody needs to know that you're recording…by the way, this pen writes, too.

‘by the way, this pen writes too.’ i would hope so! otherwise, it would just be a spy.

• orbitor electronic listening device: "hear" and "see" a conversation from a football field away…this secret surveillance device is perfect for when you really need to know what's going on!

i’m not quite sure why ‘hear’ and ‘see’ have quote marks around them. i’m also not sure how ‘secret’ this surveillance device is.

• agent cam color video spy camcorder: keep your family and personal belongings safe using cutting edge spy gear. what happens while you're away? let's face it. our vision is limited to what we can see in the moment…slip into your shirt pocket, and you'll have access to a whole new world of information you didn't see before.

let’s face it, how many audiences are you trying to appeal to? families who want to protect themselves or wanna-be spies/techno geeks? and btw, a mini camera is not going to keep your family safe.

• mega-mini pro spy camera: audio-activated portable dvr camera with amazing video quality. about the size of a stick of gum, this miniature camcorder is perfect for covert operations on-the-move…every mega mini spy camera pro comes complete with the camera, the belt/pocket clip, the neck strap, the dash mount and 1 recharger…this camera can be mounted on anything such as a helmet, bike, car, jacket, and more for the ultimate in portability and on-the-go recording.

i’m pretty sure, of all of those options, the bike will be the most-used by people buying this product.

• mini bug detector: mini handheld device is able to detect and locate the presence of concealed wireless transmitters ("bugs") that are operating in the 50 mhz to 3 ghz range. led bar display and optional audio alarm helps locate hidden devices. with adjustable rf sensitivity level to minimize false alarms.

a, i'm pretty sure the people who buy these things are the same ones who buy the spy gadgets. and b, how many calls has the fbi gotten from people using this kind of device (and this was not the only one in the catalogue, btw) who are convinced their house is being bugged? way to feed the paranoia skymall!

the next installment of 'sky mall - my favorite things' includes items such as a kitty cat potty training set, freeze-dried sod from yankee stadium, solar-powered luggage, a holiday yeti, and much, much more!