i heart wisconsin

yesterday, as i was driving to a friend's wedding, i was thinking about all of the reasons why i love wisconsin. the wedding was about an hour outside of madison, so i had plenty of time to think of lots of reasons. here are a few:

it's beautiful. i was driving through lots of farmland and it was so green and pretty. trees and cows and corn and huge lots of green grass.

it has four seasons. fall is definitely my favorite. the leaves turn colors, the air is brisk, it's wonderful. winter is a tad too long, but it's still nice to experience four distinct seasons - something i learned about in elementary school but didn't experience until i moved here.

sooooo much less traffic than los angeles. the people here complain about the traffic, and i suppose, relatively, there is more traffic in madison than outlying areas, but try to drive in la folks, then i'll listen to your concerns.

people are nice here. there are some who aren't, of course, but for the most part, people are friendly and helpful and nice.

people return their shopping carts to the designated area. (my friend sandy pointed this out about where she moved to in virginia and i realized the same things happen here) rarely do you see a stray shopping cart in a parking lot. people go out of their way to return their carts. i've never pulled into a parking stall and had to idle the engine while i got out of my car, shoved three carts out of the way, and then finish parking.

the state has a football team. i don't love football, don't follow it, never watch it, but the packer fans here are awesome. it's fun to be in a state that shows so much pride in their sports teams.

people know their neighbors. they know their names, or at least, their faces. they wave to me when they drive by, we say hi as we pass on the street. i know who lives in my building and one day, one of the younger children was outside my door trying to see rally but i couldn't see his dad. so i stuck my head out the door and looked around to make sure he wasn't alone. there was his dad, talking to our neighbor across the fence. he waved at me to let me know he was there and saw me checking.

my mailman opens my door to deliver my mail. my mailbox is nailed to my door, and on nice days, i like to leave my door open (the storm door has a window to let air in). "it's steve!" he calls as he opens my storm door and drops my mail in my box. "thanks steve!" i call back.

so there you go. just a few reasons why i love wisconsin.

my weekend from h-e-double-hockey-sticks

please be fore-warned that the topics i am about to discuss are not for children or other sensitive readers.

that said, thursday morning, around four am, i received several text messages in quick succession. startled out of a doze (i had woken up at three, thank you insomnia), i grabbed my phone and was shocked to see messages asking if i was still looking for someone, describing what the texter was proposing to do, and explaining the attributes of the texters' male parts. some of the messages included pictures. these pictures were not of the texters' faces.

wide awake now, i got out of bed and turned on my computer. my first thought was to contact my cell phone service provider and see if i could block numbers.* i quickly realized, however, that i would need to know the numbers i wanted to block and these texts (and calls) were coming from multiple, unknown numbers. i turned my cell phone to 'silent' and tried to go back to sleep but i was too freaked out to relax. the messages and calls kept coming and although i did not open the messages, i could see how they began and when pictures were attached.

i deduced from the part of the messages i could see that an ad had been placed on craig's list, soliciting casual man-to-man sex. whoever posted the ad had lots of interested parties, but would never know since he had apparently posted my phone number. i also figured out that the ad must have been placed in southern california because most of the phone numbers had southern california area codes. it was friday evening before i found the ad, flagged it, and filed a harassment complaint with craig's list. three hours later, the ad was still up and i was still receiving messages. by then i had begun responding 'wrong number' to texts and my sister was answering my phone when it rang (most callers hung up when they heard a woman's voice. they weren't interested in women.).

around 11:30, i stopped receiving messages. i still turned my phone to 'silent' for the night, however. i was still freaked out over the whole thing. i felt so helpless. craig's list didn't respond, the ad poster didn't respond (i had emailed him), and my phone number is now public. if the messages had continued, i probably would have changed my number, which i still might do.

in addition to all of that, my sister and i had food poisoning (we think). i was very happy to see monday morning, knowing that the weekend was over.

*at&t will block numbers for you but they charge a monthly fee.

i want a house

i want a house. i've wanted one for a while, but it's come to the point that every time i drive by a 'for sale' sign, i slow down and imagine myself in that house. sometimes i even stop and get the flyer.

i want a house. i know, i know, that means yard mowing and snow shoveling and repairs i'll have to pay for, but i want a house. to that end, i've come up with a three-pronged plan.

prong a: copps monopoly. for the last two months, i've been actively playing our local grocery store's monopoly sweepstakes. the grand prize is a house and i want it. every time you shop, you get a ticket with four game pieces. you match these game pieces to your monopoly board. there are lots of prizes, the main one being the house. the sweepstakes goes through the end of august so i only have a few weeks left to win my house. game pieces a102 and a106, the two i need for my house, seem to be very elusive.

prong b: save. if, by some chance, i don't win the house in the grocery store game, i've set up my direct deposit paycheck to split between my checking and savings accounts. in about four years, i'll have the twenty percent down payment for a $200,000 house and enough to cover closing costs, inspections, and the first year of taxes. i'll want a fifteen-year fixed-rate loan (no more than 4%) for 80% of the price of the house. i've found you can also finance your down payment, but that just doesn't seem like a great financial decision. i've also done research on first-time homebuyer breaks and hired lawn care. (did you really think i was going to mow my own lawn?)

the problem is, i don't want to wait four years for my house. and here is where prong c comes in: marry a rich man. i want to get married anyway, so why not find someone who can afford to buy a house? or who already has a house? or who has a relative who's about to will a house to him? really, the possiblities are endless when you throw another potential home-owner into the mix.

so, next steps. keep playing the grocery store monopoly game. in the event i don't beat the impossible statistical chances and win the grand prize, i'll just keep saving. in the meantime, i'll be keeping my eye out for a man with a house. or with enough money for a house. with a plan like this, a house will be mine in no time. and by no time, i mean the amount of time it will take me to save thousands and thousands of dollars.

my transformers 3 movie review - surprisingly emotional

yesterday i saw transformers 3 (awesome movie NOT in disguise). about the fourth time i found myself crying, i realized i hadn't taken my meds in way too long. i mean, the movie is really good, and they do use some original footage from the space shuttle landing on the moon, but six-cries-emotional? i'm not sure about that. (i said i realized i'd been off my meds at the fourth cry, not that that was the last time i cried)

warning: this post includes spoilers!

cry #1: john f. kennedy talking about the us-russian space race and hearing the famous neil armstrong's 'one small step for man, one giant leap for mankind' (again, they used original historical archival film - it was powerful!).

cry #2: sam witwicky (played by shia lebeouf) saying goodbye to the autobots 'cause they were banned from earth by short-sighted government officials. sam saying goodbye to optimus was hard, but bumblebee? fuh-get about it! i was a mess.

cry #3: hottie-hot-hottie major lennox (josh duhamel) asking which of the military guys will fight with him and a bunch of military guys saying, 'i will'. i love our military! they defend our country and our earth from invading alien forces. they rock.

cry #4: the autobots returning and optimus prime saying they were never going to leave in the first place.

cry #5: bumblebee mourning over the loss of another autobot and then almost getting killed as sam looks on, helpless.

cry #6: optimus prime's closing monologue: in any war, there are calms between the storms. there will be days when we lose faith. days when our allies turn against us... but the day will never come when we forsake this planet and it's people. for i am optimus prime, and I send this message to the universe: we are here. we are home.

whew!

there were also lots of moments that made me laugh - seriously, i was bi-polar during this two+ hour flick. when it was over, no joke, i almost clapped. i never clap at movies. live performances? sure. it makes sense. canned movies? that's just silly. but i almost couldn't help myself. but i did. 'cause it was just a movie. i see that now. during, i was caught up in a torrent of tears, tension, and titters. but today, i've recovered, and i'd just like to say, go see transformers: dark of the moon! it's awesome!

and i am not a nerd.

sort of a retraction

so the other night, i wanted to show the adults at the dinner table how adorable my nephew is. there's a good chance the other adults, who were his parents and aunt, knew how adorable he is already, but i wanted to make sure.

"b, can you tell us what the months of the year are?" i asked, smiling to myself as i anticipated his answer.

"jan-yerry, feh-rurry, march -"

"whoa, whoa, whoa! that's not what you told me the other night!?!?"

"but that's what they are!" he said, a little bit confused.

i suppose, if you're using a calendar, but that was not the answer i was expecting. he did leave out april, the most important month, especially the one occurring in 1977, but other than that, he pretty much got them right.

so, it turns out my adorable four-year-old nephew does, indeed, know the months of the year. boo. (ok, and yay, i'm glad he's such a smart little guy)

a conversation with my nephew and niece

me: there are days, weeks, months, and years
my adorable four-year-old nephew: how many months are in a year?
me: twelve
my adorable four-year-old nephew: yeah, summer, fall, halloween, summer, and winter, right?
me: right.

me: give auntie a kiss?
my adorable two-year-old niece: nooo
me: give auntie a hug?
my adorable two-year-old niece: nooo
me: polly wanna cracker?
my adorable two-year-old niece: nooo
me: ice-cream?
my adorable two-year-old niece: i-keam? i-keam? i-keam! i-keam!
me: give auntie a kiss?
my adorable two-year-old niece: nooo

finder's fee

a finder's fee is the compensation given to an intermediary in a business transaction. usually, there is a causal relationship between the one party and the intermediary (the finder), another relationship between the finder and the second party, and the two parties of the transaction would not have met if it weren't for the work of the finder. such compensation is common in business and is regulated by contractual agreements and law in the united states. a finder's fee can also be a gift from one party of the transaction, who feel morally obligated that the profits of the transaction be shared with the finder for making that transaction possible. source: wikipedia

i was going to offer a dowry, but after researching the practice, i realized it wasn't quite applicable. so, i'm offering a finder's fee. the finder's fee is for anyone who finds me a husband. although this finding is worth much more than monetary compensation, it's what i'm willing to offer. fifty dollars, usd, to whoever finds me a husband.

terms: i have to like the found male. he must like me in return. we must mutally agree to be wed. the finder will play no part in the agreement of said wedding, but will probably be invited to attend. in the event that said wedding does not occur, however promising it may look, the finder will not receive the finder's fee. disputes about these terms can be directed to my hand.

required characteristics of said husband: christian, single, breathing, steadily employed, not living with parents, thinks i'm hilarious.

preferred characteristics of said husband: witty, educated, tall, interested in world travel, handy.

men with a previous marriage and/or children are welcome to apply. men who are currently married, or who use any type of illegal drug, are not.

the women's restroom at work

there are many different kinds and styles of toilets and the women's restroom at work is apparently hoping to represent. ok, it only has three different styles, but there are only six stalls, so it seems a bit silly. one of the stalls is wheelchair accessible, the others not. one of the toilets requires you to lift the flush handle after you've flushed so that it won't keep running. most of the others, you have to hold the handle down until everything has washed away. although there are signs asking folks to lift or hold the handle, it is a rare occasion to walk into a stall with a toilet that is either not running or not full of...stuff. perhaps we need better signs, like these from japan and malaysia.

why, why penny, are you talking about toilets?! i've wanted to write about the women's restroom for quite a while as so many interesting things happen in there. the toilets are the tip of the lavatory iceberg.

the business that leases the other side of our building employs folks to clean the restrooms. these folks are in the restroom 'cleaning' just about every time i go in there. you would think the restroom would be spotless with all this attention, but you would think wrong. i just try not to touch anything.

another joy of using this restroom is the woman who comes in to hack up a lung every 15 minutes. it sounds like she's trying to get a hairball out and then she clears her throat with her mouth open and spits the resulting grossness into the sink. in.to.the.sink. i suppose it's a good place for her to do that since every time i hear it, i want to vomit and what better place to vomit than in the restroom? the best part is that she doesn't wash away what she has spat so if you are unfortunate enough to wash your hands in that sink...again, it's good there are vomit receptacles near by.

i am very grateful to have a working restroom at work, but it is really no wonder that when i have the choice to use the women's restroom at work or wait until i get home, i choose to wait. wouldn't you?

lacking dexterity, nimbleness, or grace

for $200, what is, clumsy?

i'm sorry, the correct answer was, who is, penny black?

two weeks ago, as of today, i fell outside my apartment. i didn't stumble, or almost fall, i fell. all the way to the ground. uneven pavement and i do not get along. (was it three years ago when i fell outside of my alhambra apartment and had to wear a walking boot for six weeks?)

so i fell, got up, dusted off my hands, and drove to the conference i was scheduled to attend. my ankle twinged with pain, but it wasn't unbearable and i knew it would go away. the next day my ankle felt fine but my foot was hurting. it was a little swollen and hurt when i walked, but i could handle it.

unfortunately, my hotel room was about as far away from the hotel conference center as it could possibly be. by the time i got to where i needed to be, i could barely walk, my foot hurt so badly. the more i walked, the worse it hurt. right before lunch, i decided to go to a local urgent care clinic (the conference food was not great, i knew i wouldn't be missing anything). the clinic doctor thought my foot might be broken, but when the x-rays came back, she said it wasn't (good news!) but my foot still hurt (sad news.)

i went back to the conference, limped around for a few days, and then my foot started feeling better (good news!). last thursday, however, my foot started hurting again (sad news). i asked my neurologist brother-in-law to take a look at my x-rays, just in case the clinic had missed something.

and that's where we are today. hurt foot (sad news). going to lunch with my sister (good news!).

nitrogen, erbium, dysprosium

this morning i volunteered at an event on campus, the national science olympiad. junior and senior high students, coaches, and parents from all over the country converged on the university for this three-day competition. i was originally assigned to the disease detective event, then moved to microbe mission, and finally, became a roving room monitor to make sure noone damaged the new union. here's an idea: if you're worried about damage to the new union, don't hold an event with hundreds of junior and senior high school students. or let undergrads anywhere near it.

each school was assigned to a room or area of the hallway (the hallways were wide with chairs and couches) as their 'homeroom', a place where they could put their backpacks and models, have meetings, etc. my monitoring route consisted of the movie theatre, the hallways, the computer lab - where, by the way, kids were not facebooking or checking e-mail, they were reading about molecular structure and physics-y stuff - and four meeting rooms. in almost all the rooms, i had to ask groups to take down things they had taped to walls. when i went by the first classroom a second time, the paper they had had taped to the window was still there, just lower, on the sill. i went up to the coach, prepared to ask again, when he said angrily, 'it's just leaning! and it's weighted with a penny!' i told him that was a really creative solution, he must be a science guy. i wanted to tell him to relax, but i didn't.

the second room was the allergy room. nope, not kidding. this room was for the kids with allergies, who needed to be quarantined so they didn't come into contact with anything that could cause a reaction or so if they were on medication, they could be monitored closely. this was the only room that was allowed to bring in food, due to severe nut allergies.

nothing interesting about the third room except that they weren't supposed to use the table. really? why put people in a room with a table that they're not allowed to use?

same story with the fourth room except they were allowed to use the tables and this was the junior high room. they were very well-behaved and so tiny!

on one of my pass-throughs, an irritated coach asked if i was security. i pondered that for a second and then said, 'more or less'. he proceeded to complain about the number of schools that had been assigned to each room. 1) as if security could do something about that, and 2) as if he wanted me to create more rooms out of thin air. i listened and nodded and said i would pass on his message to...someone. ah, the life of a security/room monitor.

several kids were wearing shirts with this on them, which i thought was awesome.

after my shift was over, i gave back my t-shirt - i mean, really, what am i going to do with a bright blue t-shirt with print all over it? unless those sponsors are paying me to promote their brands, i aint wearin' it. then i went and got my nose re-pierced.

happy birthday kristin gallagher!

yesterday my friends and i celebrated the 26th anniversary of the birth of our friend kristin. a bar-b-que with yummy eats by greg; wine, beer with lemonade, and diet sierra mist (ok, i was the only one who drank that); cupcakes and leftover graduation cake; taboo - what a great party! i had a ton of fun hanging out with my friends - old and new - and kristin's fam (even though i called her sister by the wrong name).

is there anything in my teeth?

lauren wisk; mark, lauren's boyfriend; me; vijay limay; kristin gallagher; and greg, kristin's boyfriend (cooper?)

my other blog

i've started a second blog: adventures in thirty-something dating. you can find it at www.pennysotherblog.blogspot.com.

cheers!

as promised

an accounting, with pictures, of my treasure sale haul:

one bicycle (with horn)
one vintage step stool
one handmade yarn artpiece, circa 1974
one large ceramic nut with a tiny squirrel on top
one stack of games and books for blake and ziva
three books (love in the time of cholera and two from the twighlight series)
one 4-cd set of classic piano medleys
one race-car shaped hard-shell suitcase for blake
one plastic backpack that unfolds into a shopping mall for ziva
one steno pad and one pack of laminating sheets for work
one uw badger clock as a welcome-to-wisconsin gift for my sister
one rain slicker that packs into a pouch (so i can return the one i've been borrowing for the past two years to my other sister)
one lightweight uw jacket

total cost: ~$100
being three hours late to work: totally worth it!

ode to yard saling

jack.pot: noun. a neighborhood full of yard sales in the midwest. example: 'this morning on my way to work, i hit the jackpot'.

yard.saling: verb. the joyous act of going through other peoples' junk in search of treasures.

oh the beauteous wonders of midwest yard sales. i left for work at 7:45 this morning and got to work three hours later. that's right, three. hours. pictures to follow of the fabulous treasures i found, but for now, a poem i wrote in honor of yard sales:

ode to yard saling
a lamp, a pillow, a pile of clothes,
a toaster, a pitcher, a plastic rose,
an old battered chair, a vintage vase,
a set of pots and doilies of lace

the driveway is covered with items used,
for buyers to pick through, bargain, and muse,
‘how much for this? how much for that?’
‘i’ll take this salt shaker and this greenbay hat’

like postal workers, weather does not deter,
these treasure hunters sellers hope to lure,
with records and knick knacks and tools and art,
toys, games, and books, they take by the cart

oh, the planning and pricing and posting of signs,
the ash trays and lampshades and ceramic felines,
the camping equipment, cappuccino machines,
the memories, the history, the plastic latrines

the treasures one finds at midwest yard sales,
it boggles the mind, amazement never fails,
a rotary phone, a cycle for one,
yard saling’s a bucket of never-ending fun!

weekend update

the middleton police department left a birthday present on my windshield in the form of a parking ticket for expired registration a few weeks ago. i went to the dmv that day and took care of the problem but in order to fight the ticket, i had to go to court last week. i had to stand when the just walked in, stand in front of a podium in the front of the room, state my case to the judge, and show my updated registration. it was all quite intimidating. i had to make a plea (i pled 'no contest'), the judge found me guilty (she had told me in advance that she would, no matter what i pled), and then she reduced the fee to $10. all in all, not bad for 15 minutes of my time. my biggest beef is that the dmv never sent me a reminder that my registration was going to expire. yeah, yeah, it's my responsibility to remember, but like that's ever going to happen. and yes they have my correct address, i checked.

friday i got a massage to celebrate the end of the semester and the loss of twenty pounds. it was a beautiful, wonderful thing and i remembered how much i loved massages. the massage therapist suggested i get a heating pad for my shoulders since that's obviously where i carry a lot of my tension. i went to bed bath and beyond and bought what is my new favorite thing in the whole wide world. if i could marry it, i would. you heat it in the microwave for a minute and a half and then wear it like a shawl. hea-ven.

yesterday i bought a pair of jeans from a store that sells pants in three lengths: short, regular, and tall. the 'short' length is two inches too long. cest la vie.

this morning i woke up with a sore throat, headache, and stuffy nose. this is a result of kissing my irresistible niece and nephew. i knew they were sick but they're just so darn cute, i couldn't help myself. i can't have juice because of my diet so i dropped some airborne into a citrus soda; it wasn't terrible. rally, my crazy, diet coke-drinking cat, kept trying to drink it and i kept pulling her away so we finally had it out. she won. she didn't get any of the soda, but i ended up with scratches. dummkopf kitty.

and with that, i'll end this post and go to target for tissues and then back to bed. adieu.

odds and ends

1. i open my mail once a week. other than during very special seasons like christmas and my birthday, most of the mail is junk. when i am done opening, i end up with a large stack of paper to be recycled, a slightly smaller stack to be shredded, and occasionally, a couple of pieces of paper i need to do something with before i recycle or shred those too. it's such a waste of paper! and my time. i posted my problem on facebook and friends suggested i, a) live off the radar, address-free, and b) mail back all of the junk in the return envelopes that come with the junk mail. both valid ideas, obviously, but there has to be a better way.

2. i think there's a mouse in my office. i've been here for about an hour and i keep hearing a little squeak. it's freaking me out a little. i thought maybe it was my chair so i held still for several seconds but the squeak sounded again. then i thought maybe it was my keyboard but no. i don't really want to look around too much so i'll just keep working and hope it goes away. and that i don't hear it scurry around.

3. i have a headache and need to take ibuprofen but i have to eat something first or i'll get an upset tummy. i ate some sugar-free jello, i'm hoping that counts. i'm a risk taker, what can i say?

4. this coming week is the last of this semester. i have a project due tuesday by noon and a paper and presentation due wednesday morning. the project is about half-way done; the paper is not started; and the presentation is about three-quarters done. technically, the presentation is about the paper so i should have written the paper first, but it's a short presentation and it helped me outline the sections of the paper. oh! so let me re-phrase, the paper is outlined. very much looking forward to being done with this semester. not because it was difficult or a lot of work, mainly because i'm bored with it.

5. i officially started as a real employee of the population health institute on friday. no longer am i a graduate student (i mean, i am, but not in a work capacity) with a project assistantship. my official title is assistant researcher which doesn't really mean anything on the hierarchical ladder because pay is commensurate with experience. my responsibilities are remaining basically the same except that i'll be working on two grants instead of one. the only bummer with giving up my student assistantship is that my tuition was paid for by the institute and now i'll have to pay for it out of pocket. but i'll be earning a real salary again so it's worth it.

6. i just heard the squeak again.

clothing management issues*

so the great thing about losing weight is the knowledge that you're on your way to meeting your goal, not being fat anymore, being able to look in the mirror without cringing, etc. the not so great thing is, once you lose a certain amount of weight, your clothes start drooping and falling and looking ridiculous. belts and tape and safety pins will only do you so much good. to compound the problem, i wear loose clothing as a general rule because, really, who wants to see a fat person wearing tight clothes? gross. so now i've got loose clothing drooping and falling and looking ridiculous...more. and (we're switching back to the proverbial 'you'), you're not done losing weight so you're not going to buy new clothes right now because in a few weeks, those won't fit you either. but that's not really a problem because you've kept two large tubs of clothes from when you were a much smaller size (and every size in between) so you have clothes to wear, it's just a matter of figuring out what size you are now. ah, your bedroom. so organized and clean a few weeks ago. now a cacophony of pants, shirts, casuals, work wear - strewn haphazardly about in your attempt to find something that fits your shrinking body! oh, the chaos of it all!

and then, when it all seems to be too much, you remember. you are on your way to your goal. you are making evident progress - messy, but evident, progress. and you can look around your disaster of a bedroom and give it a serene smile because soon enough, it will be time to get rid of all of those drooping, falling, too-big clothes. you'll be taking them to st. vinnie's and telling them (the clothes, not st. vinnie's) to kiss your thin behind!


*title contribution by flavia gibson

sleep, thou doest elude me!

i've already written about how productive i've become as a result of my new 5am wake-up habit. what i haven't written about are the negative things about waking up at 5am. let's review, shall we?

1. f.i.v.e. a.m. do i really need to say anything else? oh, but i will. at least the birds are singing at that time so it's a little pleasant. dark, because it's still the middle of the night, but chirpy.

2. no one i want to talk to is awake at that hour. or for several hours after. not that i'm chatty first thing in the morning but if i'm awake and getting things done that means i'm going to have to talk to someone about something at some point and if that person is sleeping because they live in a different time zone, or the same one, for goodness sake, it's very inconvenient.

3. stores are not open at that hour. or for several hours after. oh wait, there's walmart, open 24 hours a day, my least favorite store. i did go there this morning because it was the only store open and i needed hangers but they didn't have the ones i wanted. then i went to hobby lobby but, you guessed it, they weren't open yet. i'd been up for hours, it didn't even occur to me that the store might not be open.

4. i want to eat lunch by 10 am.

that reminds me, what time is it? i'm starving!

the recipe for productivity

1. get really fat
2. go on a diet, say, the dean weight management, very low calorie diet.
3. about a month in to the diet, begin waking up at 5-5:30 am every morning, including on the weekends (a side effect of the diet). forget about naps, you will no longer be able to take them. this extended period of wakefulness will lead to many hours of productivity.

for example, yesterday, saturday, i got up, cleaned out half of my closet, drove over to my sister's house, helped get the kids out of the house, went to target to help my sister return a rug, picked up some things i needed, then went to walmart (gross), then to woodmans (black cherry diet rite, yay!), and then on to my office (was there by 9:30am) and worked for seven hours. came home, caught up on conan, picked up the apartment a bit, played on my computer a bit (a long bit), and finally went to bed. this morning, and please note, it's just now...now, 8:00am, i've finished cleaning my closet, made a list of things i need to get at another walmart (gross), looked up another walmart (gross)'s location and driving directions, caught up on facebook, organized my sock drawer, edited a previous blog post, and written a new blog post. this is ridiculous. i suppose i should point out that other than the seven hours of work yesterday, i haven't done anyting that really needs to get done, like deep cleaning my apartment or writing my dissertation. maybe in another month or two i won't be sleeping at all and i can clean while i write my dissertation.

until then, i'll just take advantage of shopping at walmart (gross) when it's not crowded and getting lots of other little things done.

my socks

the happy dance

what a day! i finally heard back from the graduate school - the administrative body on campus that is in charge of all graduate programs - that my proposal for a special degree program, a phd in public health evaluation, has been approved. i immediately ran down the hall of my office yelling (i'm not kidding, i yelled), 'i'm approved! i'm approved!' as if i wasn't happy enough about that, i've been on a diet for a few weeks so as i ran, my pants started falling down so then i had to be happy about the fact that my dieting is finally paying off!

emails, texts, calls, and facebook posts ensued, followed by returned emails, texts, calls, and facebook posts, making me feel very validated and loved. one man, whom i respect quite a bit, called me a 'pioneer'. for those of you who haven't looked up the definition of pioneer recently, a pioneer is 'one who is first or among the earliest in any field of inquiry, enterprise, or progress'. go penny, go penny, it's almost your birthday, shake your nay-nay.

in addition, for those of you who are too far away to see my happy dance in person, i've included this video clip for your viewing pleasure. enjoy.

laundry (literally and metaphorically)

if you have children, it is perfectly acceptable, in my opinion, and expected, one might think, to do laundry quite frequently. many moms i know do laundry every day just to stay on top of the soiled shirts, pants, socks, undies, bath towels, kitchen towels, sheets, and whatever else manages to get dirty thanks to those adorable little ragamuffins. in resource-limited settings, where people wear the same clothes everyday and use river water to wash their belongings, it also makes sense, in my opinion, to do laundry often as the more frequently one wears something, the sooner it gets dirty.

i do not, however, understand, why a couple of young, middle-class adults, both fully employed with no children or pets and living in middleton, wisconsin (and, as it happens, living in the apartment directly above me), need to do laundry every single night of the week. i know they do laundry every night of the week because i hear them open and close the door of their apartment, run down the stairs, slam the door of the basement/laundry room, which is adjacent to my apartment door, start the washing machine, slam the door of the basement/laundry room, run back up the stairs, and open and close the door of their apartment again. this happens at least twice every night, more if they are doing more than one load of laundry that evening. it's even noisier if they come down together 'cause then they chat it up while they load and/or unload their laundry.

just to be clear, i don't begrudge my neighbors clean laundry or conversation. but seriously, every night? do they each own one set of underpants? can they not go commando one day and give the laundry room and me a break? sheesh!

moving on. i got the cutest kitchen timer from avon!


and i have the cutest niece in the world. i also have the cutest nephew but i don't have a recent photo that expresses his cuteness while masks his identity.

dr. brilliant

tuesday night i escaped, uh, i mean, took a break, from class and as i walked through the atrium i saw a sign for an upcoming seminar. the name of the speaker caught my eye: murray brilliant, phd...dr. brilliant?! are you kidding me? how awesome is that name? and then i got to wondering, do you think, because of his name, murray felt obligated to get his doctorate? do you think, growing up, his teachers had higher expectations of him because of his name? do you think he spent his childhood hearing comments like, 'with a name like that, you'll do great things for sure!' that's a lot of pressure. maybe he really is brilliant. dr. brilliant.
brilliant.

lent

i had a meeting last week on the 14th floor of warf. as i got off the elevator i saw my friends nancy and john. john looked slightly out of breath. john is in great physical shape so i guessed the only thing i could think of that would cause him to breathe heavily. 'john,' i said, 'did you walk up the stairs?!' indeed, he had. 'wow!', i said, 'i'm impressed.' 'don't be,' he said, 'catholic guilt, i gave up the elevator for lent.' i was still impressed and made him give me a high five. quick-witted nancy piped up, 'i gave up sweating for lent.' she got a high five too.

and here's a little history of lent: lent in the christian tradition, is the period of the liturgical year from ash wednesday to easter. the traditional purpose of lent is the preparation of the believer — through prayer, repentance, almsgiving and self-denial — for the annual commemoration during holy week of the death and resurrection of jesus, which recalls the events linked to the passion of christ and culminates in easter, the celebration of the resurrection of jesus christ.

why i won't wear green today

st. patrick: st. patrick was not born in ireland, but in britain. irish brigands kidnapped st. patrick at 16 and brought him to ireland. he was sold as a slave in the county of antrim and served in bondage for six years until he escaped to gaul, in present-day france. he later returned to his parents' home in britain, where he had a vision that he would preach to the irish. after 14 years of study, patrick returned to ireland, where he built churches and spread the christian faith for some 30 years.

saint patrick’s day: saint patrick's day is a religious holiday celebrated internationally on 17 march. it commemorates saint patrick (c. ad 387–461), the most commonly recognized of the patron saints of ireland, and the arrival of christianity in ireland. it is observed by the catholic church, the anglican communion (especially the church of ireland), the eastern orthodox church and the lutheran church. saint patrick's day was made an official roman catholic feast day in the early 17th century, and has gradually become a celebration of irish culture in general.

catholics vs. protestants: the terrible combination of nationalism, politics and religion has had deadly consequences for the people living in northern ireland. catholics and protestants have been vilifying, attacking, torturing and killing each other in a seemingly endless cycle for decades. the origins of ireland's "troubles" lie in the distant past of english imperialism. the creation of an anglican protestant church also created a fundamental religious conflict with an irish population having little interest in converting with their neighbors. it wasn't until the reign of elizabeth i that ireland was finally "conquered," but she was never able to halt regular catholic uprisings. conflict has continued ever since, becoming ‘the norm’ for the irish.

...in 1985, a relatively quiet year, authorities recorded fifty-four assassinations, 148 bombings, 237 shootings, 916 woundings, 522 arrests on terrorism charges, 31 kneecappings (shooting out a person's kneecaps) and 3.3 tons of explosives and weapons seized. all this in a tiny country with a population of 1.5 million people.

the wearing of the green: the colors of the republic of ireland are a tricolor of green, white, and orange. the green represents the catholic population, the orange the protestant, and the white the peace between them. the clashes in ireland between the catholics and protestants are often clashes of the green and the orange. the traditional pinching of a person who wears orange (or doesn’t wear green) on st. patrick's day is a mild form of the violence that has so often occurred in the past.

although the united states has taken on the celebration of st. patrick’s day with parades and river dying, guiness drinking and corned-beef and cabbage eating, very few americans are aware of the true meaning of the wearing of the green. i know i have a tendency to make a big deal out of things no one else does, but i just can’t wear green on st. patrick’s day. to do so would show support of a long-standing political conflict masked by religious debate.

younger and hipper

today a co-worker approached me with a "very important question". as a "younger and hipper" representative of the world (her words, not mine), she needed me to interpret a phrase that had meant one thing when she was in college but now, she was pretty sure, meant something else entirely. she was correct that my hips are younger than hers, but just barely. and she was right that the phrase she was using has a new meaning. we discussed how "young and hip" was definitely relative since my sister considers me an old woman just because i keep foot cream on the table next to my bed. hey, my feet need moisturizing! she also says i'm old because i use words like 'gal' and 'okey-dokey'. i thought of another one the other day but haven't had a chance to use it yet: 'it's a gas!' isn't that cute? i think it's a gas! ha! i used it!

speaking of my sister, she'll be in madison in eleven days. yay!!!!

poetry by penny

friday morning i awoke with a sore throat. drat, i thought, i don't have time to be sick. a lack of time, notwithstanding, i proceeded to get sicker throughout the day and by friday night, i was in a bad way. coughdrops weren't cutting it, airborne wasn't doing a thing, orange juice, puh-leeze. i had to pull out the big guns. the nightime sniffling sneezing coughing aching stuffyhead fever so you can rest should be federally regulated medicine. as the nyquil suffused my body, i could feel myself laying heavier and heavier on the matress. turning my head took so much effort. strange, i thought slowly. and then the poetry began. i giggled as i drifted off to sleep. something about yoda? when the drugs wore off around four-thiry am, i struggled to remember my poem.

nyquil taken
heavy feeling
yoda talking
goodnight

i didn't say it was good poetry. ah, nyquil. not only do you help me sleep, you give me funny stories. my sister said nyquil should have a contest for craziest nyquil stories. i can only imagine.

can't think of a title

just sent my first e-mail to my committee. was going to post this on facebook, but thought it might be a little obnoxious since that's all i seem to post about lately. this, however, is my blog and i can post what i want to, post what i want to, post what i want to. you would post to if you had a committee.

it's a happy-dance day

what a great day. the sun is shining (somewhere); it's a brisk 33 degrees outside, which means snow is melting, birds are singing, i just caught a typo and avoided embarrassing myself, man! could it get better? hmmm, i suppose i could have a meeting this morning and secure my fifth and final committee member for my phd!!!!!! uh-huh. uh-huh. uh-huh-uh-huh-uh-huh. it's been a four-and-a-half month journey. meeting with people, pitching my ideas, getting names of more people to meet with, getting names of people i've already met with, revising my proposal twenty-seven times, on and on. but for now, it's done. sigh of relief. next step: polish up the proposal, send out to my committee (oh, does that feel good to say!) for final feedback, traipse all over campus for each of their signatures, and submit for approval from the grad school - basically, the administration and authority over special degrees like mine. here is my final cast of characters (and by final, i mean, for now; things can always change):

patrick remington, md, mph, has agreed to serve as the chair of my committee. thank you, thank you, thank you.







d. paul moberg, phd, my boss and the guy i met in washington dc at a conference before i came to wisconsin. great guy, super smart, and this is a terrible picture of him.






susan zahner, drph, teaches in the school of nursing, is super nice, and was my first non-pop health committee member to sign on. thank you susan!!








shep zeldin, phd, teaches in the school of human ecology. not much to say yet, don't know him well. but super greatful he agreed to be part of my committee!








gary green, phd, met him this morning, love him already. really nice, seems supportive of my ideas, does work internationally and domestically with community development and building assets in communities.






so yay! moving on. i'm also suddenly filled with a feeling of, oh my goodness, what have i done? these people now have expectations and i have a responsibility to deliver. i no longer belong to a department; i am an island...





i'm an island! i'm an island! hoorah, hooray! i'm an island! and i have a committee! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !
! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !

new kicks

got me some new kicks. and what better way to break them in than to wear them out on a cold, icy wisconsin winter day? unfortunately, converse don't exactly have the greatest traction, so it may not have been the best shoe choice for today, but when you get new shoes, you have to wear them right away!i've been wanting brown all stars for a lloonngg time. i finally ordered them last week and they arrived yesterday. i haven't bought shoes in a couple of years so it's a pretty exciting day, wearing new shoes. there's a definite bounce in my step. people are saying, penny, something's different... and i point to my new kicks. ahhh, people say, nodding and smiling, must be the shoes.

i say hello and you say hello (and then i say hello again)

oh, the social conundrums we face. take telephone greetings for instance:

'hello?'
'hello. may i please speak to penny?'
'this is...i am...that is, her...i am she.'
'great, penny, this is so-and-so from somewhere.'

and while i am still trying to figure out the grammatical puzzle of my first response, i am hit with yet another issue. how do i respond to the caller's self introduction? possible responses:
'oh…' - natural but insufficient
'ok…' - see above and a little rude
'hello…' - redundant, that’s how i started the conversation
'what do you want?' - sincere, but rude, i've been told
‘mmm-hmmm?’ - non-committal, one of my favorites, but doesn't exactly ooze intelligence
'oh, hello, how are you?' - the combo approach, completely insincere 99.9% of the time

social etiquette dictates the redundancy option but i just feel like there has to be a better way.

you have to read this just because i spent so much time trying to upload the stupid attachment

flav called me on her way to milwaukee this afternoon and asked how i was doing. she had the nerve to tell me i was being dramatic when i replied, 'dying a little more inside as you and the kids get further away.' last night the clan picked me up for dinner and sam tried to make me feel better by saying it was only three saturdays. blake promised not to forget me. blake also managed to explode a little cup of creamer all over the table within thirty seconds of us sitting down. we told him it was no big deal but he still hid under the table while the server cleaned up the mess. you can't possibly be wondering why i'm going to miss him.

so a couple of weekends ago i posted on facebook that i had 'so much to blog about' and then, i'm sure, all three of my readers were super disappointed when i didn't follow through. not surprised, just disappointed. well, here's what happened that weekend: i started saturday morning at flav and sam's because i was working on a paper for a class at their house until the wee hours of the morn. breakfast with the kiddos and then i was off to the campus library. flav packed me a lunch so i wouldn't have to leave the library and eight hours later, i finished the paper, thus officially ending my third semester at uw. it was a day and a half late (what else is new? i don't think i turned one thing in on time this last semester) but it was a kick-a** paper, if i do say so myself. sunday morning i went to church (victory clasp to the left, victory clasp to the right), walked in to the auditorium, and there, up front, is this huge choir singing christmas songs. i immediately burst into tears, the effect i'm sure they were going for, found a seat, and just sat there crying while they sang. i don't know if it was because it reminded me of my childhood or my grandpa or my involvement with music or what, but man, was i emotional. flavia finally showed up so i was able to start making my usual jokes and comments about everything and anything (she really likes when i come to church) so i got over the crazy crying thing. my favorite pastor spoke, making it a great service all around. he has been encouraging people to spend less and give more, that is, buy one less gift and give that money toward other needs around the world. he had people volunteer to cary forty liters of water around the auditorium throughout the entire service as a demonstration of what people without clean water supplies have to do just to get enough water to drink, cook, and wash with. i thought it was great and wanted to include a link to his talk but the church website isn't quite that fancy. here's the video (you'll need quicktime):
and here's the link to the church's website and their 'message archive' if you want to watch or listen to other stuff: http://www.blackhawkchurch.org/resources/message_archive.php#.

after church, a friend of mine from school got baptized. it was a really simple service but so, so beautiful. all seven of the people who got baptized were from china so the service was in english and mandarin chinese. a man read each person's testimony in english, then a woman read it in chinese, and then the person was baptised by the pastor. some of these people were leaving to go back to china that week. at the end of the ceremony we sang amazing grace and the words of the song were on the overhead screens in both english and chinese. as i stood there, i realized people were singing in both languages so i pulled out my phone to record the song. if i ever get around to finding the media card thingy i need to transfer the file from my phone to my computer, i will post this beautiful musical event.

so that was that weekend, totally worth a blog.